I’m sure you’re all as deflated as I am over the news that Tom Brady and Giselle Bundchen have decided to split (amicably) after 13 years together. “We still love each other,” Tom explained, “but the air has gone out of the marriage.” My favorite Tom Brady line was by Steve Somers of WFAN who said that within five years, Brady will be younger than his children.

In other sports news, how about them Phils! Realmuto’s game-winning dinger was the first World Series game-winning home run by a catcher since Carlton Fisk’s for the Bosox in 1975. Wow! Eerily, the puzzle today at 23A had “Word after White or Red,” and the answer was SOX. And the two teams Fisk played for were the Red Sox and the White Sox. I remember wondering whether he’d go into the Hall of Fame as a Red Sock or a White Sock, and my brother said “Maybe he’ll go in as an argyle.” In the end, he went in wearing a Boston cap. I only learned recently that it’s not the player’s choice as to which team cap he wears on his HOF plaque. The Hall decides.

The puzzle had some nice clues today. “Grant in folklore studies?” turned out to be THREE WISHES. (I have a dirty joke about a genie I’ll tell you later.) “‘Li’l Abner’ creature” turned out to be SHMOO, and “[Blank] C. Evans, journalist who co-founded All-Negro Comics (1947)” was ORRIN. (I’m not sure how helpful that “(1947)” was.) “All-Negro Comics” was the first comics magazine written and drawn solely by African-American writers and artists. It was the brainchild of Orrin Cromwell Evans, and the hero was Ace Harlem, a Black police detective. Only one issue was published.

Al Capp’s Shmoo is shaped like a plump bowling pin with stubby legs. It has smooth skin, eyebrows, and sparse whiskers—but no arms, nose, or ears. Its feet are short and round, but dexterous. It has a rich gamut of facial expressions and often expresses love by exuding hearts over its head. Shmoos reproduce asexually and are incredibly prolific, multiplying faster than rabbits. They require no sustenance other than air.

Those of you keeping track of the many appearances of a tuchas in the NYTXW will be pleased to know that the clue for 30D fits the bill: “When you might see a star’s moon?” The answer: SEX SCENE.

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The Jewish Genie. So this old Jewish guy, Murray, finds a lamp and rubs it and an old Jewish genie comes out. He says he can only grant one wish. That business about the three wishes is nonsense. So Murray says, OK, and he pulls a little map out of this wallet and shows it to the genie. “This is a map of the Middle East,” he explains. “The country in the middle is Israel, and it’s surrounded by Arab states. My wish is that you bring peace to this troubled region of the world.”

And the genie says, “Well, that’s sort of a socio-geo-political type of wish. Mostly we grant wishes for wealth, fame, personal happiness, that sort of thing. Can you come up with something along those lines?”

So Murray thinks for a while and then he takes a photo out of his wallet of a little gray-haired lady. He shows it to the genie and says, “This is my wife Estelle. It’s been a wonderful marriage and she’s a wonderful wife. But she’s always been hesitant about oral sex. So my wish is that you get her to loosen up in that area.”

And the genie stares at the picture for a while and says: “Let me take another look at that map.”