You gay? (Not that there’s anything wrong with that.) If you are, you better tiptoe yo’ gay ass the hell out of Uganda, that’s for sure. Uganda passed a law in May that carries the death sentence for certain categories of same-sex offences and lengthy jail sentences for others. A handful of folks have been charged. 

Burundi ain’t much better. President Unpronounceable (Ndayishimiye) said “If you want to attract a curse to the country, accept homosexuality. [Hmm. That may explain New Jersey.] I even think that these people, if we find them in Burundi, it is better to lead them to a stadium and stone them. And that cannot be a sin.” Of course not! Wait, what happened to “Thou shalt not kill?” Has that been repealed and I missed it? Is adultery still off the table? (Just kidding, darling.)

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It was a big Detroit night at Owl Chatter, as we turned our attention (and TV) to both the football Lions playing in Dallas, and our beloved hapless Pistons at home facing the Torontons. 

The great news: it’s over. The losing streak is over. The Pistons won 129-127. They pretty much had it sewn up with an 11-point lead with not much time remaining, but then they didn’t. There was a steal, and a rain of three-point shots, and missed fouls. Suddenly, the lead was down to two points with one second to go. We just had to inbound safely, but that had become iffy with Toronto pressing and there were no time-outs left. A steal and a quick shot would tie it. Well, I forget who was inbounding, but he just heaved the ball to mid-court. Brilliant. Even if a Toronton caught it, he’d have just one second and would have to score from there. It was over. Cunningham dropped to his knees with emotion. It was over. 

The Lions fared less well. Down by 7 with less than 2 minutes to go, they drove brilliantly down the field and scored. The extra point would send the game into OT. But Coach Dan Campbell is a riverboat gambler. He leads the league in crazy. We were going for two points: do or die. QB Jared Goff tossed the rock to Amon-Ra St. Brown who caught it. We win! But, wait. Not so fast, Gonzalez. Turns out the play was illegal, according to the refs. Some fuzzy rule on eligible receivers no one understands was violated. Lions lose.

It’s okay, though. They’re still in the playoffs with a solid 11-5 record and one game to go. And they looked damn good! 

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This poem is by Mary Oliver. It’s called “Walking Home from Oak Head” and was in The Writer’s Almanac yesterday.

There is something
about the snow-laden sky
in winter
in the late afternoon

that brings to the heart elation
and the lovely meaninglessness
of time.
Whenever I get home – whenever –

somebody loves me there.
Meanwhile
I stand in the same dark peace
as any pine tree,

or wander on slowly
like the still unhurried wind,
waiting,
as for a gift,

for the snow to begin
which it does
at first casually,
then, irrepressibly.

Wherever else I live –
in music, in words,
in the fires of the heart,
I abide just as deeply

in this nameless, indivisible place,
this world,
which is falling apart now,
which is white and wild,

which is faithful beyond all our expressions of faith,
our deepest prayers.
Don’t worry, sooner or later I’ll be home.
Red-cheeked from the roused wind,

I’ll stand in the doorway
stamping my boots and slapping my hands,
my shoulders
covered with stars.

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The irrepressibly positive Lewis posted this lovely comment today on Rex’s blog, about Crossworld, the blog, and the community that inhabits its comments space:

“I love this place. We have a regular gang, a beautiful quilt that warms the heart, supplemented by the bowl of popcorn – infrequent and one-time drop-ins – that, aside from a few uncooked kernels, add zing. It is a group formed by and infused with passion for a pastime we are smitten with.

“What a gift, this neighborhood! It will once again, I know, bring Happy into the New Year, and I’m ever grateful for it and to you all. Wishing all much sweetness in the year ahead.”

Amen to that, Lewis.

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Today’s puzzle was a crafty paean to a time-honored NYE tradition: the “ball drop” at Times Square at midnight. At five places in the grid there was a pair of “Before midnight” and “After midnight” clues with the word BALL “dropping” from the first to the second and forming part of it. E.g., at 87A, the “before” midnight clue was “Surpass” and the answer was GO BEYOND. Then, the B going down became BALL (clued at 88D as “Ump’s call”). And then at 109A the “after midnight” clue was “Totally lose it” and was LISTIC starting with the second L in BALL. So you had to combine BALL and ISTIC to get BALLISTIC.

GOBEYOND
  A
  L
  LISTIC

Alright. Never mind. Now you know how my students feel.

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Theresa CAPUTO was in the grid. You hear of her? Me neither. She’s a medium, and I don’t mean her size. She, like, reads minds and stuff. She must have been reading Phil’s, judging by this look she gave him. Just back away slowly, buddy.

She’s from Long Island and had a TV show from 2011-2019 called Long Island Medium. (How the hell did they ever come up with that name?) It may shock you to learn that her claims of superpowers have been widely challenged, including by Randi, who used to be the magician “The Amazing Randi,” and who now unmasks frauds.

But, okay, whatever. She’s respected as a “performer.” We’ve had worse people in the grid, although that hair isn’t winning her any points.

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Journalist KATIE Couric popped by too.  Looking good, girl! Take a load off. Hey, we never thanked you for popping Sarah Palin’s bubble way back when. Great work!!

This was part of it:

COURIC: And when it comes to establishing your world view, I was curious, what newspapers and magazines did you regularly read before you were tapped for this—to stay informed and to understand the world?

PALIN: I’ve read most of them again with a great appreciation for the press, for the media, coming f—

COURIC: But like which ones specifically? I’m curious that you—

PALIN: Um, all of ’em, any of ’em that, um, have, have been in front of me over all these years. Um, I have a va—

COURIC: Can you name a few?

PALIN: I have a vast variety of sources where we get our news too. Alaska isn’t a foreign country, where, it’s kind of suggested and it seems like, ‘Wow, how could you keep in touch with what the rest of Washington, D.C. may be thinking and doing when you live up there in Alaska?’ Believe me, Alaska is like a microcosm of America.

In other areas, Palin came across worse. When Tina Fey was working up her parody of Palin’s answer on the bank bailout, she used Palin’s actual answer verbatim.

After the election, Couric was on with David Letterman and the Palin interview came up.

COURIC: I’m not sure whether she was afraid to offend certain people, by, she would offend conservatives by saying she read the New York Times.

LETTERMAN: Or people who don’t read. She was afraid of offending people who don’t read. Maybe that was it.

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Dear Readers: This is Owl Chatter post #398. We won’t hit #400 until next year. I have no idea how we’ll celebrate or who, if anyone, will attend (beyond Phil and George and the owls, of course). It will be as much of a surprise to me as it will be to you — just as, each morning, I have no idea what craziness the day will bring us. And yet close to 400 times enough nonsense to write about has popped up. It’s been a blast.  Ooooh! — maybe Ana de Armas will surprise us — it’s been too long! Ana darling — you free later this week?

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See you tomorrow!