Readers of Owl Chatter (both of you) can easily attest that I am an expert in [pause for dramatic effect] — absolutely nothing. But even I recall the dreadful days of Covid and the relief the vaccine brought to us all. Well, to those of us not dead. Was the vaccine not clearly what allowed us to close the door on those years? And yet the person named by RFK Jr. to head the task force on Covid vaccine safety described it as “the most failing medical product in the history of medical products.” [Well, what other history would it be? — the most failing medical product in the history of the NBA?] Anyway, anyone following the utter lunacy of Kennedy even remotely would not be surprised. The only reason I mention it is the name of the guy. He’s Retsef Levi. He’s a doctor, but not a doctor doctor. His degree is in Operations Research. And what caught my eye is his name, Retsef, which spelled backwards is “fester.”
Actually, he’s an interesting guy. He’s Israeli and the Hebrew word “retsef” means secret, or hidden. His Ph.D. is from Cornell and he is the J. Spencer Standish Professor of Operations Management at MIT. He was an intelligence officer in the elite Israeli Intelligence Corps. And we love the ponytail, Doc!
Ricky Gervais says he can’t see the message in Humpty Dumpty.
Humpty Dumpty sat on a wall
Humpty Dumpty had a great fall
All the king’s horses and all the king’s men
Couldn’t put Humpty together again.
He says: “All I get out of it is ‘Don’t sit on a wall if you’re an egg.’”
Meanwhile my legal problems continue to mount. The store manager accused me of stealing Swiss cheese but there were holes in his case. He said I took the scotch tape too, but the charge wouldn’t stick. The art gallery said I didn’t pay for the prints, but I was framed. I was lucky the plumber’s complaint didn’t hold water, but the electrician is bringing charges. The optician sued me too, but I don’t see him winning. I’m worried most about the beef the butcher has with me. There’s a lot at stake, so I’m on the lam.
My cousin went out with an optician but they broke up. He said whenever they were in bed together she kept going, “Is it better this way? Or this way? This way? Or this way? This way? Or this way?”
Miriam Webster’s “Word of the Day” yesterday was apathy, but who cares? That’s what we call in the bad joke business “low-hanging fruit.” That really was the WOTD, btw.
I haven’t seen Bobby Orr or Mel Ott in the puzzle lately, but they are frequent visitors. An Oreo pops in at least once a week. Yesterday, the clue for it was the best I’ve ever seen: “_____ cow (black bovine with a white belt around its middle).”
It’s real and called a Belted Galloway. They are a Scottish breed and it generally takes up to six very strong men to dunk one in milk.
Singer-songwriter Camila CABELLO was featured right at the top of the Friday puzzle at 8A. The clue referenced her 2022 hit album “Familia.” She’s another Cuban beauty like our Ana. What are they doing down there? What the hell is in those cigars?
Camila is single. From Aug. 2022 to Feb. 2023 she dated Austin Kevitch, the founder of the Lox Club. Yes, it’s that kind of lox — the kind that pals around with whitefish. It’s a dating app founded in 2020 “for Jews with ridiculously high standards,” but it’s open to non-Jews too. Kevich says: “It’s like a deli: culturally Jewish, but anyone can enjoy it.” She’s dating some billionaire now.
The clue at 56A was “Be ruthless,” for TAKE NO PRISONERS, but it was a pretty easy puzzle for a Friday, IMO.
Did you know SAMUEL CHASE is the “Founding father who is the only Supreme Court justice to have ever been impeached?” Ignorant boor that I am, I put down Samuel Adams first. Duh.
Also learned that a peacock’s “display” is an OSTENTATION. The term “male peacock” is redundant, because a peacock is a male peafowl. Female would be peahen. The more common term for when a peacock struts his stuff is a display. Ostentation can also be the term for a group of peacocks.
O say did you know (28D) the national anthem of SPAIN has no official words?
This poem by Wayne Miller, shared by poets.org yesterday, was inspired by his realization that the super in his apartment building, a woman, was like a god to the tenants, but one with her own emotional and psychological life. It’s called “Theological.”
The super worked all day
as a conductor on the subway
and in the evenings as a dominatrix.
She lived above me. I heard a mix
of pain and pleasure—impossible
to tell the difference in that studio full
of my own silence. On the front stoop
I ran into her clients, who drooped
in exhausted gratitude.
Once, I knocked.
When she cracked
the door I could see she’d been crying.
Behind her, a TV blued
the room; something was frying
on the stove. I had a small concern.
She told me, I’ll get to you in turn.
In the puzzle today, for the clue “It’s formed in Pittsburgh,” the answer was OHIO RIVER.
At 36A, for the clue “I’ve helped all I can,” the answer was MY JOB HERE IS DONE. Rex carped a bit over the phrase being more commonly “my work here is done.” And there’s some history to it. At some point, it turned from being used seriously to ironically. The Lone Ranger would often say something like it at the end of episodes. That’s when it probably became a catchphrase. And some feel it turned due to this scene in Mel Brooks’ Blazing Saddles:
Sheriff, you can’t go now. We need you.
BART: My work here is done. I’m needed elsewhere now. I’m needed wherever outlaws rule the West, wherever innocent women and children are afraid to walk on the streets, wherever a man cannot live in simple dignity and wherever a people cry out for justice.
TOWNSPEOPLE (in unison): BULLSHIT!!!
BART: All right, ya caught me
Here’s how The Simpsons handled it.
I loved the cluing choice at 28A. There are so many options for cluing EDWIN, but constructor Ryan Judge went with “M.L.B. All-Star closer Díaz.” I was at Citi Field when he was called in from the bullpen once. It’s a kick.
Break up the Gnats! The boys just took the series from the Mets in DC two games to one and the opening game from the Phils last night. What’s gotten into them? We’ll see first hand when we subway up to the Bronx on Wednesday to see them face Yankees.
See you tomorrow! Thanks for popping in.
The Wellington Files 