I am proposing that the following New Yorker cartoon replace the disgraced Coat of Arms of UPENN, my (law school) alma mater.

“Let this be a reminder: when they go low, we cave.”

Penn’s motto, laughably, is leges sine moribus vanae. “Laws without morals are useless.” That’s easy to fix: just remove vanae, and you’re left with “Laws without morals.” Done!

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I just received my copy of the 11/24/2025 issue. I no longer expect the cartoons to be funny. But several have taken a new turn: I simply don’t understand them. I can’t figure out how they were even trying to be funny.

Take this Koren:

“No, no, no—I want just one day, totally unscripted!”

I haven’t the foggiest idea of what the hell is supposed to be going on. Anybody? I see the giant arm and the sports equipment. So?

And this one — what the hell is supposed to be going on? Is it me?

“Did you download enough podcasts?”

One more. This one.

“Wow—the horses are really little tonight.”

What do they think could be funny? That the horses are small is a comedic idea? Didn’t they ride there on those horses? Were they bigger earlier?

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From The Onion:

Gifted Khashoggi Head Mounted In Oval Office

Man Hoping People Notice How Many Folding Chairs He’s Carrying At Once

TALLAHASSEE, FL—Looking visibly flushed as he hurried across the gymnasium floor, local teacher Greg Tollefson reportedly hoped that everyone helping to clean up after Thursday morning’s assembly at Mangrove Hills High School would notice how many folding chairs he was carrying at once. “You can just leave those there—I’ll come back and get the rest,” said Tollefson, hoping that his addition of a fourth folding chair to the three already secured under each of his arms would be seen and admired by all. “Yeah, I got it. You guys can focus on packing up the AV equipment.” At press time, sources confirmed that Tollefson was fairly certain that at least a few people had noticed he had chosen the heavier metal chairs over the plastic stackable ones.

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Here is a recent post of mine from the Dull Men’s Club (UK):

Hi. American here. Hope this issue is relevant over there.

I made some lasagna yesterday and it came out fine. There were 15 pasta “sheets” in the package and I arranged them in four layers: 4-4-3-4. But the directions on the package implied I should have layered them 3-3-3-3-3. That is, deeper and less wide. I can try that next time, as an experiment, but am wondering if the esteemed membership (i.e., you) has any thoughts on the matter.

(Photo is not actually of mine, but comes close size-wise. SWMBO and I dug into mine before I thought to raise the issue here.)

[OC Note: SWMBO (acronym pronounced SWIMBO) stands for “she who must be obeyed.” It’s commonly used in the Club for one’s wife.]

Comments:

Andy Spragg: Ask yourself what is special about 4-4-3-4, as opposed to 3-4-4-4, 4-3-4-4, or indeed 4-4-4-3, and I suggest you will be well on the way to answering your own question.

Avi: I must be a stupid ass. Your point is eluding me.

Andy: You asked us if we had any thoughts on the matter. My comment provided you with mine.

[Still puzzling to me, but I’m letting it go.]

James Banks: Personally I favour 3-4-2-1 and I will never deviate from that, but then my other name is Ruben Amorim. [OC Note: That’s a soccer reference. Those numbers are how the players would be positioned.]

Dave Henry: Shouldn’t you be asking the Italian chapter of the DMC?

Bob Golding: if he does that he will get 25 answers all different.

Nina Cassar: Ooh. Now I tend to only have three layers of pasta (don’t put one on the bottom like some do). But I like extra sheets on the top for the last top layer to sit on. I would arrange mine as follows:

Top white sauce layer & lots of cheese
PASTA (7)
Meat layer
PASTA (4)
White sauce (cheese of course)
PASTA (4)
Meat Layer

Avi: We could call it a Cassar-role!

Tes Slater: Cooking is more an art form than a science. Science is involved but it is the artistry that makes it special.

Avi: Agreed. But then how do we explain Picasso’s terrible meatloaves?

Robert John Wilton: depends on size of dish but also depends on whether using oven-ready noodles or not. My lasagna pans work out to 3 side by side and one at the end sideways. Each layer I alternate which end has the cross piece to stablize the whole dealy. As for depth, I do four layers of noodles if making meat lasagna, whether beef or chicken. Between first two layers just sauce & cheese for a base, then beef & mushroom, or chicken & peas etc. between next layers. If just doing a simpler lasagna without a meat sauce, then I do 5 layers of noodles. Someone I know had square pans so they alternated the direction on each layer… some have sloped sides so it might be 3-3-4-4 etc.

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I loved the early Bond films and read some of the books. Fell off after Sean Connery stopped. One of the Bond girls was in the puzzle today. The clue was “Vesper Lynd portrayer in ‘Casino Royale.’” Wonder how many of the others are Jewish like EVA GREEN is.

Eva is French, and Phil says she scared the sh*t out of him. Was it the eyes, Buddy?

Actually, according to the website JEWORNOTJEW.COM, between 1971 and 1977 three of the four Bond girls were Jewish: Jill St. John, Jane Seymour, and Barbara Bach (who has been married to Ringo since 1981. Yes, that Ringo — what other Ringo is there?).

Jill St. John was born Jill Oppenheim. She’s 85 now and has been married to Robert Wagner (who is 95), for 35 years. Kinehora. Showing no concern for stereotyping, Jill’s Wikipedia page says: “As a young girl, St. John says she never played with dolls, instead preferring a toy cash register and money.” Her dad owned a restaurant in Brooklyn. Her mom gave her the name St. John as a stage name, thinking it would sell better than Oppenheim.

Hard to break Phil away from those bedhead shots.

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At 29D today, the clue was “Humor with an edge,” and the answer was BITING WIT. I posted the following on Rex’s blog:

Another clue for BITING WIT could be “Dentist jokes.” You’re in luck (bad luck). I’ve got two.

Just before the dentist started to work on Mrs. Johnson’s molar, she reached up and grabbed him by the nuts. He looked down at her, stunned. And she said: “Now, we’re not going to hurt each other, are we?”

A Texan at the dentist.

Dentist: Your teeth look fine, Mr. Baxter.

Baxter: Drill anyway, Doc, I feel lucky.

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Our classical music host (on WQXR) just said “It’s World Philosophy Day. Or is it?”

It is! UNESCO established it as the third Thursday in November. Philosophy-related activities are supposed to be organized, including, primarily, trying to figure out what a philosophy-related activity is.

Yesterday, he referred to a piece as having been written by Tchaikovsky’s brother, which led me to wonder: Isn’t Tchaikovsky’s brother also Tchaikovsky?

Okay, my brain hurts a little now.

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See you tomorrow Chatterheads! So glad you could pop by!