The Wellington Files

  • Tippytoes

    At 1 across on Monday, the clue was “Theater backdrop” and the answer was SET. OK, fair enough. But then when I got to 8D, the clue was “Sink, as the sun,” and that had to be SET also. So what gives? A puzzle is not supposed to have duplicate answers. Then, all hell broke loose when 31A and 31D both had the same answer which, again, was SET. Those clues were “Prepare, as the dinner table,” and “Mathematical grouping using curly brackets.”

    Of course, the repetitive SETs were the puzzle theme. And the revealer was at 71A (the last across clue): “Guinness world record holder for ‘English word with the most meanings.’” That was news to me. The puzzle contained 14 meanings, i.e., the answer SET appeared in the grid 14 times, each clued via a different meaning for the word. But in fact, get this —

    “The word with the most meanings in English is the verb ‘set’, with 430 senses listed in the Second Edition of the Oxford English Dictionary, published in 1989. The word commands the longest entry in the dictionary at 60,000 words, or 326,000 characters.”

    What made the execution of the theme “clean” was there were no other three-letter answers at all in the grid. The 14 SETs were the only three-letter answers.

    The cutest clue/answer was at 25A: “Cleaning implement for bunnies?” The answer was DUST MOP (think “dust bunnies”).

    33D was cute too: “You might stand on them to reach something.” TIPPYTOES.

    At 11D, the clue was “Philip Larkin or Patricia Lockwood,” and the answer was POET (I had heard of the former). It led Rex (who is an English prof) to share this:

    For today’s puzzle, I’m not sure if this was meant to be a joke, but for 8D the clue was “I’m all _____” and the answer was SET. D’oh! But that was the only SET today.

    There was a very non-Tuesdayish word today. The clue was “Trumpet flourish,” and the answer was TUCKET. WTF? One commenter noted: “Retired musicologist here, with a vast vocabulary of arcane terminology related to music and musical instruments. This is my first (and hopefully last) encounter with TUCKET.”

    Miriam Webster says: Tucket can be found most notably in the stage directions of several of William Shakespeare’s plays. In King Lear, for example, a tucket sounds to alert the Earl of Gloucester of the arrival of the Duke of Cornwall (Act II, Scene i). The word tucket likely derives from the obsolete English verb tuk, meaning “to beat the drum” or “to sound the trumpet.” Its first known use was in 1593.

    Commenter Anony-mouse wrote: As a drag performer, I TUCKET all the time. Well, very often.

    Today’s theme was announced by 58A: “Title for Jackie or Jill:” FIRST LADY. And four theme answers all opened with words that form a name when preceded by LADY: GAGA (ABOUT); LIBERTY (VALANCE); MARMALADE (SKIES); AND LUCK (OUT). So that would be Lady Gaga, Lady Liberty, Lady Marmalade, and Lady Luck.

    Lady Marmalade is a song made famous by Labelle containing the famous lyric:  “Voulez-vous coucher avec moi?” But this isn’t that — this is Lady Luck.

    Hey Trav — you may have some new heavyweight competition. Maybe a few extra dozen roses? Just sayin’. Here’s what Trump said about Tay:

     “I think she’s beautiful — very beautiful! I find her very beautiful… I hear she’s very talented. I think she’s very beautiful, actually — unusually beautiful!”

    We don’t usually like to go out on a limb here at Owl Chatter, but, reading between the lines — does it seem to you Trump thinks she beautiful? I wonder if he’ll grab her by the, you know. It may be best if he doesn’t –Back in 2013, someone grabbed her tush and she took him to court. It was a DJ, David Mueller. He got fired for his actions. His defense was: “My hand was at rib-cage level and apparently it went down.” Yup, down and under her skirt. That’s one hell of an “apparently.” I don’t know if I’ve ever seen such a big apparently.

    “It was a definite grab, a very long grab,” Swift said in federal court. “I felt him grab onto my bare ass cheek.” She testified she attempted to move away but “he would not let go.”

    When asked her reaction to Mueller being fired, she said “I’m being blamed for the unfortunate events of his life that are a product of his decisions, not mine. I don’t feel anything about Mr. Mueller. I don’t know him. … I think what he did was despicable and horrifying and shocking.”

    So whadya think folks? — Is Taylor Swift very beautiful like Trump says? Judge for yourself:

    Oh, wait — I’m sorry — that’s not Tay — it’s E. Jean Carroll, the woman Trump sexually assaulted. He says she’s not his type at all. Not “very beautiful,” I guess. Never mind. Tay’s out of town right now. Phil promises us some shots of her as soon as he’s sober. Figure maybe October?

    Alan Davis posted the following for the Dull Men’s Club (UK): Swmbo decided that a trot around IKEA would be a good idea. Wrong, it was horrible, we couldn’t find the way out for ages. Never again.

    First, a comment asked “what is swmbo?” Answer: It’s the person’s wife; it’s an acronym for She Who Must Be Obeyed. Here were some of the other 53 comments:

    I’m 63 yrs old and have never been to an IKEA. I’d love to go, if only for the meatballs.

    The meatballs are made out of the people who never get out.

    There are people in Ikea who’ve been trapped there for months.

    In IKEA no one can hear you scream.

    Hibbing, MN, is not that big a town. Population only 20,000. It came up today because Rex shared a song by Gary Puckett, and a commenter noted Puckett’s from Hibbing. Many of you know Bob Dylan is also from there, as are, amazingly, Roger Maris, Celtic great Kevin McHale, and Robert Mondavi, the wine guy, among other notables.

    Also from Hibbing was Frankie Campbell, the pro boxer Max Baer killed in a match in 1930. Baer was enraged after being knocked down in the second round and beat Campbell fiercely in the fifth round, causing his death. The ref was suspended for not stopping the fight. Campbell’s brother was Brooklyn Dodger Dolph Camilli.

    See you tomorrow!

  • Abide No Hatred

    Adriana O’Toole shared the following story with us in Met Diary yesterday.

    Dear Diary:

    In 1959, I signed up for a mushroom identification course at the New School taught by the composer John Cage.

    In those days, I often accompanied my uncles when they gathered mushrooms in the woods near Greenwood Lake in New Jersey. I thought it would be a good idea to really know something about what we were picking.

    The class met on Sundays, in a park off the Palisades Parkway. About 15 of us walked around with baskets and picked mushrooms.

    It was all very casual. We just walked in the park, saw different mushrooms and learned about them, including which ones were harmful. I still remember that the amanita is poisonous.

    Cage was instrumental in starting the New York Mycological Society, and he also got me started on collecting mushroom-related things: prints, ceramics and so on.

    Nowadays, I get my mushrooms at the local Acme or ShopRite, saute them in butter, or pickle them with vinegar, and dress them with garlic and olive oil.

    . . . . . .

    Here’s a mother amanita mushroom caring for her child. Stay away from them!

    Except for these. These “stuffed mushrooms” we love.

    At 14A today, the clue was “Irksome, like a fly,” and the answer was PESKY. If it were up to me, I would have clued it: “Johnny _______, aka Mr. Red Sox.” Pesky had a ten-year playing career, mostly for Boston, and then coached and managed, and worked as a broadcaster. He missed three seasons to serve heroically in WWII. He played on the left side of the infield. Over 1270 games, his lifetime batting average was .307 (just three points below Jeter’s). The right field foul pole at Fenway is the “Pesky” pole named after him by pitcher/broadcaster Mel Parnell. Pesky was a contact hitter with little power. He hit only 17 home runs in his career, and the ones at Fenway likely landed close to that pole. Pesky trivia: He was the first AL player ever to score 6 runs in a nine-inning game.

    When the Sox were awarded their championship rings for the 2004 “curse-breaking” WS win, one was given to Pesky too, and he was granted the honor of raising the Championship flag. He represented all the Boston players who toiled so valiantly during the long drought. A ring and the same honor was awarded to him after the 2007 WS victory too. On his 87th birthday, his number 6 was retired by the Sox and the right-field foul pole was officially dubbed the Pesky Pole. He was born in Portland, OR, but died in Danvers, MA, at the age of 93 in 2012.

    If I’m not mistaken, the Yankee Phil Rizzuto had a set to with Pesky at one point that left some bad feelings. I was listening to Rizzuto announce a game one night and his partner said: “You hate Pesky, am I right?” And Phil said — Nooo! I don’t hate anyone.” Then there was the longest pause, after which he said: “I just can’t stand him.”

    I suppose there’s a distinction.

    We’re closing shop early tonight. Linda and I had a great day celebrating our 40th anniversary. Yow! We crossed this bridge when we came to it. It brought us across the state line between PA and NJ. Our excellent lunch at the Black Bass Inn awaited us on the PA side.

    We ran into this flag on our walk in Lambertville.

    (The Jewish version says ABIDE JUST A TEENSY BIT OF HATRED.)

    See you tomorrow!

  • A Waltz About Whiskey On Ice

    One of the nice things about writing Owl Chatter is that it gives me a reason to look at poems that are sent to me by the Poetry Foundation and the Writer’s Almanac to see if there are any I’d like to share here. And you may have noticed (in your occasional sober moments) there’s been a dearth lately. (A dearth in the family.)

    Take today, for example. I just looked at today’s poem from the Poetry Foundation. It lost me at the fourth word: lacteal. Jeez Louise, fellas — could you please dumb it down a bit!? Sheesh. We’ve got George Santos on our staff, our photographer Phil, who spends his nights sleeping in the street, drunk, and I’m not too sharp myself. Lacteal isn’t going to make the bias cut.

    This one is by Elizabeth Bishop and is called “Full Moon, Key West.” It’s from today’s Writer’s Almanac.

    The town is paper-white:
    the moonlight is so bright.
    Flake on flake
    of wood and paint
    the buildings faint.
    The tin roofs break
    into a sweat
    of heavy dew
    dripping steadily
    down the gutters
    click click.
    Listen!
    All over town
    from black gaps
    in bedroom gables
    from little tables
    behind the shutters
    big alarm clocks
    tick tick.
    A spider’s web
    glints blue, glints red,
    the mirrors glisten
    and the knobs on the bed.

    The island starts to hum
    like music in a dream.
    Paper-white, drunk,
    the sailors come
    stumbling, fighting,
    mumbling threats
    in children’s voices,
    stopping, lighting
    cigarettes
    with pink dull fires,
    in groups like hands
    and fingers on
    the narrow sidewalks
    of cement
    that carry sounds
    like tampered wires,
    —the long strings of
    an instrument
    laid on the stream,
    a zither laid
    upon the flood
    of the glittering Gulf.

    OC reader Delaware Pam (nee Iowa Pam) responded to our photo of Keira Knightly yesterday in her green bias cut gown, with a note opining that Keira “has NO curves and is way too skinny.” Pam has a modicum of expertise on the topic as a former Weight Watchers leader.

    Keira is exquisite, of course,

    but there is the feeling out there in the public sphere that she is too thin. (Contrary to the belief of many Jews who feel there is no such thing as too rich or too thin, there is such a thing as too thin.) Chris Rock has a bit on heavy women in which he says he would “drop kick Keira Knightly” to get at Rosie O’Donnell. But I’ll leave it up to you to decide on KK for yourself. For the record, I’m with Phil — thin, but not too thin.

    There’s a great baseball rivalry in play this weekend: The Dodgers are at Yankee Stadium. The two powerhouse offenses: Ohtani, Judge, Soto, Betts, Freeman, et al, couldn’t muster a single run over the regulation nine last night. Even with the placement of the “ghost” runner on second base in the tenth inning neither team could score. LA struck in the eleventh, however, and pulled out a 2-1 win. The Dodgers’ Japanese ace Yamamoto was sensational for seven innings. The Yankees countered with a newcomer: little Poteet, Cody, who held his own very nicely for 4.2 innings before yielding to the pen. Good arms!

    Elsewhere, the Gnats ended their skid, topping the Atlantans, 2-1 in DC.

    With the Mets and Phils playing in London this weekend, the NYT had a nice story on the gents who were born in the UK since 1900 and played in the major leagues. There were only ten! The most famous, and the only one whose autograph I have in my collection, is Bobby Thomson who hit the “shot heard round the world” for the Jints against the Brooklyns in 1951.

    P.J. Conlon was born in Belfast and thus became the only pitcher in MLB history to throw a Belfastball. He pitched 3 games for the Mets in 2018 for a gaudy (in a bad way) ERA of 8.22. Hey, for you Cape Codders, he also pitched for the Chatham Anglers in 2014 in the Collegiate Summer League.

    With his MLB debut for the Mets in Cincy, Conlon became the first Irish-born player in the majors since 1945. A large family contingent, including his parents, came to see him. “You could see them in the stands, waving Irish flags,” said Conlon, who also had a flag stitched to his glove. “They’re proud of it, and I’m proud of it.”

    Whoa — here they are! Phil, you’re incredible. I bet they were cheering when Conlon got his first MLB hit against Cincy in that game. He’s only 30 years old now but has retired from baseball.

    Les Rohr was born in Lowestoft, England and also played for the Mets. Injuries limited his MLB career to six games but he beat Don Drysdale in one of them, pitching eight shutout innings in LA. Wow. He passed away in 2020 at the age of 74.

    Of the others, Danny Cox had the best career. Born in Northampton, England, he pitched in the Cardinal rotation from 1983 to 1988 and had a lifetime record of 74-75 with a 3.64 ERA. Cox won Game 3 of the 1985 NLCS, and pitched well in the 1985 World Series, but earned two no-decisions. He pitched a shutout in Game 7 of the 1987 NLCS, and was the winning pitcher in Game 5 of the 1987 World Series. Impressive. He’s 64 years old now.

    Here’s the ballpark in London:

    One of the classic exaples of chutzpah is someone who murders his parents and then throws himself on the mercy of the court on the grounds that he’s an orphan. At 33A today, the clue was “Harry Potter, e.g.,” and the answer was ORPHAN. Here’s a pretty song by Gillian Welch.

    At 41D the clue was “The final dance in “The Nutcracker,” for one,” and it was a WALTZ. This song is by Mandolin Orange (with the E-tones).

    I don’t need much of nothin’
    Except all your lovin’
    And a waltz about whiskey on ice.

    I’m going to let those tunes ease us out tonight. Niece Deborah with hubby Nick and princess Cordelia Anastasia are due in later. Looking forward to it.

    You may recall, my brother-in-law Mitch made a last request of me that I’d keep in good touch with his daughters after he passed. And he was annoying enough while alive — I don’t need him coming after me from the grave. (LOL, Mitch — LOL.)

    See you tomorrow!

  • Broadway Joe

    If it took you all this time to stop drooling over the Paige Bueckers photo that appeared in this space yesterday, I’m sorry to have to send you back there to look at it again. But (my bad!) I forgot to point out that Paige is wearing her official Owl Chatter sweats in the shot! Take a close look. They look great on her (as would a potato sack, tbh) and are available in sizes ranging from beanpole thin to double extra fat for only $189.00.

    Chris Jenkins, of the Dull Men’s Club (UK) posted the following: “Sitting here in the adult holding area of a soft play centre, occasionally glancing in the vague direction of my 6 year old and reading a ”Which” article on how best to clean an air fryer…….. life doesn’t get much duller than this. (I don’t own an air fryer).”

    Helene Cook: Living the dream.

    Things then got a little testy when Val Dixon asked: How do you clean an air fryer?, noting that they are a nightmare.

    Sam Charleston replied: Buy some silicone sleeves. Very rarely have to take the draws out to clean them now.

    Then this erupted:

    I don’t need to be spending more money

    I only answered your question

    But you didn’t. I asked about cleaning it.

    Sheesh!

    I added the following: I’ve never felt the need to fry air. Especially with global warming going on.

    Since their successful road trip last week, in which they went 4-3 against Atlanta and the Guardians — two very good teams — the Gnats have hit the skids, dropping the whole 3-game series to the Mets plus a singleton to Atlanta. Good to see Lainie Thomas pop one yesterday, though — we need his bat to heat up (maybe get a bat fryer?). Runs are very hard to come by.

    Here’s Lane with his pretty wife Chase, the baby, and Grandpa. Lane seems to be wearing pants with only one leg — where does he shop? — the amputee store? Half off?

    This shot was taken back during the pandemic. Phil convinced them to remove their masks for the photo, no doubt infecting the old man and the baby. Phil! Check if the kid is breathing! Looks awfully still.

    In the puzzle today at 29D the clue was “Legendary figure whose first name sounds like something he’s known for doing.” Did it come to you? Me neither, but I got it from the crosses: ROBIN HOOD. Of course!

    Here’s a tune by Cat Power.

    My mouth is the scene of a lot of dramatic action these days. I’m trying to eat on the right side exclusively so as not to interfere with the healing process from the extraction that took place on the left side. And I was having some rice at lunch — which was very risky. A grain could get caught in the recovery zone and wreak havoc. But it was a Japanese restaurant — had to have rice.

    So I was being very careful, concentrating on every bite. But I must have gotten distracted for a moment because I could suddenly tell that a patrol of rogue grains of rice had shot across my mouth and were threatening to descend into the wound! I mobilized my tongue immediately to go after them. The key was keeping them together: if they split into three (or more!), at least one could make it through and do damage. I managed to corral them and safely swallow. Whew.

    At 22A the clue was “I love mankind … it’s ___ I can’t stand”: Linus from “Peanuts.” The answer, of course, was PEOPLE.

    Commenter dragoo shared this:

    I’ve read that one of Charles M. Schultz’s favorite authors was Dostoevsky, which might explain what influenced the Linus quotation. Ivan Karamazov, the modern, free-thinking one of the Brothers Karamazov had this to say:

    “The more I love humanity in general the less I love man in particular.”

    And he explained himself further:

    “In my dreams, I often make plans for the service of humanity, and perhaps I might actually face crucifixion if it were suddenly necessary. Yet I am incapable of living in the same room with anyone for two days together. I know from experience. As soon as anyone is near me, his personality disturbs me and restricts my freedom. In twenty-four hours I begin to hate the best of men: one because he’s too long over his dinner, another because he has a cold and keeps on blowing his nose. I become hostile to people the moment they come close to me. But it has always happened that the more I hate men individually the more I love humanity.”

    “Yeah, that’s what I meant,” says Linus.

    An exchange (in its entirety) from the DMC (Dull Men’s Club):

    Jeff Vint: Neighbours put out a recycling bag with an Easter egg box in it! Who waits that long, surely it’s a record.

    Chris Bater: I don’t know.

    Jeff: There is no question mark.

    Chris: There should be.

    Other comments included: We have a King Charles coronation large chocolate coin that my wife thinks will be collectible in about 20 years. I disagree, and would like to eat it before it expires.

    And: My husband still has a chocolate orangutan I bought him for Valentine’s Day back in the 1990s (can’t remember when) – he’s not being overly sentimental, he just couldn’t bring himself to destroy that cute ape and eat it.

    Broadway Joe NAMATH was in the puzzle today — what a treat! It inspired me to share this story with the Rex folks:

    When my son Sam was a student at UMich in Ann Arbor, the Jets made it to the AFC Championship game. If they could beat Peyton Manning’s Colts in Indianapolis on Sunday, they’d be in the Super Bowl.

    It’s “only” a four-hour drive from AA to Indy. I went onto Stubhub and found tix available for just around $100 each. It said “obstructed view,” but so what? — you just lean your head a little and you can still see everything, right? So I called Sam and asked him if he had a lot to do for Monday at school. He said he had two midterms and a 25-page paper due that he hadn’t started yet. I said, “Great, so you’re free for the game!”

    I borrowed my friend Michael’s bright green #12 Joe Namath jersey and started my drive from NJ to Annie Arbor (9 or 10 hours) on Saturday. We’d leave for Indy Sunday morning.

    There’s a great Jewish deli near the stadium in Indy and we arrived in time to grab a sandwich there before kickoff. Perfect! Sam and I walked through the door — me in my bright green Namath jersey — and all at once about 150 guys all wearing blue Peyton Manning jerseys turned and glared at me. If looks could kill . . . Yikes! So I said to Sam: Maybe this wasn’t the best idea. And Sam said: Are you talking to me, sir? I said — Sam! You’re forsaking your own father for a corned beef sandwich!! I’ve never been more proud of you!

    TBH, everyone was very friendly to us — they hate the Patriots more than the Jets. The Jets lost, of course.

    BTW, the obstructed view seats were directly behind a very wide post — we could see no part of the field from the seats: nothing. D’oh! Our plan was to try to sit in an aisle on steps but, miraculously, several seats stayed open near us and we slipped into them for the whole game.

    whatsername posted this reply: Great story! Wear your Jets jersey to KC’s Arrowhead any time. You’ll be welcomed with open arms and invited to eat tailgate BBQ. I read a news article once about a couple from Seattle who traveled there to watch the Seahawks play. They had so much fun that they went home and sold their house and moved to KC.

    Ha!

    Go deep, everybody!

    Last, at 37A, the clue was “Feature of many haute couture dresses,” and the answer was BIAS CUT. I’ve never heard of it, to no surprise.

    In short, it’s the technique of cutting on the diagonal grain (at 45 degrees) of the fabric rather than the straight and cross grains. The technique causes the fabric to fall and drape in a way that creates a slinky silhouette.

    It was ‘invented’ by Parisian couturier, Madeleine Vionette, in 1927 and became a popular 30s shape. Think of the iconic green dress Keira Knightly wore in the film Atonement. A bias cut is commonly used for sexy nightgowns, seductive dresses and slinky skirts. The cut causes dresses to caress the curves and delicately flow.

    Keira loved the dress and insisted on wearing it nightly.

    Thanks for dropping in. See you tomorrow!

  • Cataracts of Hay and Cobwebs

    Here is a painting by Emil Nolde.

    And here is a another one.

    He was in the puzzle today. The clue was Expressionist Painter Nolde, and the answer was NOLDE. No, I’m kidding — the answer was EMIL.

    You hear of this guy, Bob?

    Rex shared a little write-up on him in his blog:

    He was one of the first Expressionists, and one of the first oil painting and watercolor painters of the early 20th century to explore color. He is known for his brushwork and expressive choice of colors. His watercolors include vivid, brooding storm-scapes and brilliant florals.

    But then it goes on to say: Nolde was a racist, anti-Semite and a staunch supporter of Nazi Germany.

    Yikes! Do we really need this guy in our puzzle? There’s no other EMIL out there? The constructor was Michael Lieberman, so there’s a good chance he’s Jewish. And get this — the EMIL in the grid is crossing SHTETL at 42A. Did someone drop the ball on this?

    Moving on, commenter Dr. J wrote: Re “SHTETL” As a frequent non-professional transliterator l hate the standard transliterations of both Yiddish and Hebrew into English because they always seem to be the work of academic linguists who don’t care about the rest of us. Surely “SHTETEL” is more felicitous?

    But Joe R. replied: SHTETL is just a better transliteration than shtetel, it more accurately captures the sound made at the end of the word. The point of transliteration is not to English-ify the words, it’s to provide a representation of what the word should sound like, and some languages have sounds not encountered in English. You’re right that the transliterators don’t care about you, they care about conveying the information needed so that you know to pronounce it shtetl and not shtetel. Do you also complain that rhythm should be spelled rhythum or that owl should be spelled owel?

    [For the record, Owel Chatter prefers shtetl.]

    Ady Scoots of the Dull Men’s Club (UK) posted this today:

    “I was at a junction in my 2014 VW Transporter, indicating right, and found that my indicator was in exact reverse synchronisation with the car in front, a 2015 VW Polo. I have never had my indicators in sync with someone else and can only assume that it is due to them using the same flasher relay and voltage regulator.”

    Colin Osborn asked: Does the relay click when the light goes on, or when it goes off though?

    Richard Henry added: I particularly enjoy when my indicators sync with music that I’m playing. And Debbie Vogel said: Even better is wiper blades that keep time.

    Then, Dave Willmott noted: The rate of flash is meant to be electronically governed as you say, but can be affected by many factors including variations in the manufacturing tolerance of the individual electronic components, the voltage output of your alternator and battery, and the ambient temperature. If you’d have sat there for long enough, the synchronisation would have gradually drifted off.

    Boo! You’re no fun, Willmott!

    This letter appeared in NYT today:

    Donald Trump’s guilt or innocence is of no consequence for me. As far as I’m concerned, he’s the lesser of two evils.

    My family suffers under President Biden and the Democrats. And, contrary to Mr. Biden’s assurances that we’re really better off, we just don’t know it, I know exactly how much more I’m paying for gas. I know exactly how much more we’re paying for food, electricity and water.

    My family was definitely better off under Mr. Trump, and that’s of consequence for me.

    Edward Little

    Temple City, CA

    The NYT Arts Section today featured a story about the resurgence of Ukrainian folk music in the face of wartime struggles. Here’s an unusual group, called Dakhabrakha. Sing along!

    Have you gotten your “Caitlin Clark: White B*tch” jersey and t-shirt yet? Things have gone nuts since the outrageous foul we reported on recently. Pat McAfee, who has a sports show on ESPN, referred to her as a “white bitch” while singing her praises the day after the foul, and reaped the whirlwind. He apologized. Clark, classy as always, said “no prob” and appreciated that he reached out to apologize.

    Some strange forces have been unleashed via Clark’s ascendance. Here’s what some are saying: The WNBA has had excellent play for years but has failed to catch on because many of the players are gay and/or Black. Here comes Whitey the milk-fed farmgirl from the Midwest and suddenly the league’s popularity goes through the roof. Hence the resentment.

    Here’s another WB to keep an eye on: Paige Bueckers, aka Paige “Buckets.” Plays for UConn. Lookout, everybody — this one’s even blonde. Also from the Midwest. The whole country is going to sh*t its pants.

    [Note that Paige is wearing her official Owl Chatter sweats.]

    My usual sources for poems have been dry lately. Nothing grabbing me. So I am resorting to our resident poet, Ted Kooser. Here’s a poem of his called “So This Is Nebraska.” I’ll print it out, but I urge you to listen to Dick Cavett’s reading.

    The gravel road rides with a slow gallop
    over the fields, the telephone lines
    streaming behind, its billow of dust
    full of the sparks of redwing blackbirds.

    On either side, those dear old ladies,
    the loosening barns, their little windows
    dulled by cataracts of hay and cobwebs
    hide broken tractors under their skirts.

    So this is Nebraska. A Sunday
    afternoon; July. Driving along
    with your hand out squeezing the air,
    a meadowlark waiting on every post.

    Behind a shelterbelt of cedars,
    top-deep in hollyhocks, pollen and bees,
    a pickup kicks its fenders off
    and settles back to read the clouds.

    You feel like that; you feel like letting
    your tires go flat, like letting the mice
    build a nest in your muffler, like being
    no more than a truck in the weeds,

    clucking with chickens or sticky with honey
    or holding a skinny old man in your lap
    while he watches the road, waiting
    for someone to wave to. You feel like

    waving. You feel like stopping the car
    and dancing around on the road. You wave
    instead and leave your hand out gliding
    larklike over the wheat, over the houses.

    See you tomorrow!

  • If I Were A Rich Man . . .

    In the puzzle today, the clue at 37D was “Proprietor of cheeses and butters” and the answer was DAIRYMAN. Malaika, the guest blogger for Rex today, said she had never heard of the term. She had heard of milkman, but not dairyman.

    Of course, Tevye, from Fiddler on a Hot Tin Roof (as my brother used to call it) was a dairyman. If you look up Tevye in Wikipedia it calls him a dairyman first and only secondly a milkman. Here’s a joke from way back when Fiddler first came out and you had to wait forever to get tickets:

    For one afternoon performance, a man in the audience noticed that an entire row of seats was empty except for one woman sitting in the middle. He went up to her and said “Madam, it’s impossible to get tickets for this show. Do you have any idea how all of the seats in this row could be empty?”

    And she said, “Well, sadly, this seat next to me was my husband’s. And since we got our tickets months ago he passed away.”

    And the man said — but all these other seats? The rest of the row?”

    And she said — “Oh, those are our friends. They’re all at the funeral.”

    DAIRYMAN in the puzzle opened a door for a commenter to Rex’s blog who calls him or herself the Greater Fall River Committee for Peace & Justice.

    “My grandfather was a dairyman. He started out as a milkman when he first came to America. He had to get up at 3:30 in the morning to drive the truck to the farms and pick up the milk to deliver by dawn. In winter my grandmother also had to get up at 3:30, because in order to start the truck, boiling water had to be poured into it, and only women could boil water at that time, I am told. By the time my grandfather retired and moved to Florida (where the trucks start in the morning all year) he was running an operation that not only bottled the milk and cream, it churned the butter, made buttermilk and sour cream and ice cream and cottage cheese and even flirted with things like kefir.”

    [Was there some law against men boiling water? I don’t get that part of it.]

    The puzzle defeated me today. I couldn’t get LYRA as the “harp-shaped constellation.” I committed to lyre and it screwed me up. Oh, well.

    Here’s an old star map from 1825 with LYRA on the right, next to Cygnus. I had no idea so much was going on up there. Jeez Louise!

    This was a great clue: “Mine is ⬛️⬛️⬛️-⬛️⬛️-⬛️⬛️⬛️⬛️: Abbr.” Get it? The answer was SSN, which is usually very boringly clued.

    Another good one was “____-violence (really tearing into an Indian appetizer?)” The answer was NAAN. Although, I think of naan as a bread rather than an appetizer.

    Raymond Swan, of the Dull Men’s Club, UK Chapter, shared this yesterday. I’m not sure it’s dull enough, but it got by the monitors.

    “I made a small error whilst driving the other day which seemed to enrage a fellow motorist, he blared on his horn and was screaming at his windscreen red faced. So thinking I must have ploughed over a line of ducklings following their mother across the road or ran a school bus full of 7 year olds into a ditch, I pulled over and when he came alongside I rolled down my window and asked what the issue was.

    “‘You’ve come up the slip road and left your left hand indicator is on as if you were going to turn left however you’re going right!!!’ (I was in the lane to go right).

    “I looked at my indicator, noticing my error and said in as friendly a voice possible ‘Oops you’re right, I bloody well have, sorry about that mate!’

    “The angry guy’s whole demeanor changed instantly and he smiled as he said ‘oh no worries, just thought I’d let you know’ gave me a little wave and drove off.

    “I think most of the time, road rage comes from people not acknowledging their own mistakes along with the issue of people getting enraged by small errors and blowing them out of proportion.”

    I commented that my brother believed there were only two kinds of drivers in the world: Raving lunatics who don’t belong on the road, and him.

    Sandra Davies came back with this tale:

    “My brother was once angrily shouted at by another driver in a double queue of traffic. He had no idea why. They then both pulled up at traffic lights that had just turned to red and my brother took the opportunity to nip out of his car, tap on the other driver’s window to enquire what on earth he’d done to incur the other bloke’s wrath and apologise if appropriate. To his surprise, the man just slid down in his seat, said ‘nothing! Nothing at all’ and quickly wound up his window. Somewhat perplexed, my brother got back into his car and went on his way. He later recounted this strange interlude to me. I said ‘you don’t think the fact that when you got out of your car, he noticed that you’re 6’ 4″ and built like a brick shithouse, and that may have made him think he might not get home alive if he entered into a debate about driving etiquette?’”

    Donald Payne, Jr. easily won his primary for re-election to his House seat for NJ yesterday. It helps when you are running unopposed. He’s the son of Donald Payne, Sr. (duh), who was the first ever Black House rep from NJ. He served from 1989 until his death in 2012. Oh, did I mention, Don, Jr. is dead too? Sorry. He died over a month ago from a heart attack at age 65. There will be a special election to replace him on the ballot. Here’s the dad:

    Dave Ikin of the Dull Men’s Club (UK) posted the following, with a photo:

    “For an initial 75p outlay this box of cereal will probably last me for 25-30 breakfasts. Obviously milk is a minor associated cost with this. However, is there anything better value pound for pound for your breakfast?”

    There were 105 comments. (I’m not kidding.) My favorites noted the condition of the box, that it seemed a bit rudely opened.

    Martin Brown asked: Did the packaging offend you in some way? Ikin replied: No. Brown explained: It’s a reference to the way it was opened. Ikin: Thanks. Ikin again: Dull Men’s Club is great, isn’t it? Brown: Sure is.

    Charlotte Henry was horrified: What did the box do to you ? Or were you simply so ravenous for cornflakes that you had to massacre the box like that? 😭 Ikin: Was starving. Plus, the box just split open like that.

    Ruth Howard: Was it opened by wolves?

    Ikin: People seem very triggered about the box.

    He posted a second shot of it, from a different angle:

    The more substantive comments addressed the portion size Ikin described. They didn’t agree that he could get 25-30 breakfasts out of it. David Griffiths asked: How much do you eat — an egg cup? Ikin: No. John Fowke: Are you a mouse? (No reply.)

    Many comments strongly preferred what they called porridge, but which I think we’d call oatmeal, both in terms of cost and nutritional value. Others suggested eggs.

    Not wanting to end today’s post abruptly with that image, we called in our style/culture consultant, Ana de Armas, to see what she had to say about the issue.

    Ana: How did he open the box? It’s all torn.

    OC: Seriously.

    See you tomorrow!

  • Mexican Blintzes

    It’s National Cheese Day. I’m probably considered a rogue cheese eater here in America on this day. When we visited Ireland last year we went to a “cheesemonger” in Dublin. My idea was to bring some fine Irish cheese back for Caity as a gift. (We got Sam coffee beans from Galway.) When I explained to the cheesemonger why we were there, he grabbed a chunk of Irish Cheddar and sliced off a taste for us. It was great and we bought some for Caity and some for us. Back in the U.S. we now use a nice Irish cheddar that Costco carries, see below. I do eat American cottage cheese. So there’s that. Maybe that will placate the American cheese community. I certainly don’t need them on my ass.

    I had the remaining part of my molar removed today by an excellent oral sturgeon in Summit NJ: Petar Hinic. I know he’s excellent because this is the third time I’ve used his services. And he knows he’s excellent too. When he showed me the x-ray and explained what would be involved, he said it would be a difficult extraction because there are two roots and the top of the tooth broke off so there is nothing to grab onto. Then he said: “But that’s why you’re here.” Amen to that, Brother. It went very well.

    At 5A today, the clue was “‘Inside with Jen ___’ (MSNBC show),” and the answer was PSAKI. Here’s what I posted on Rex’s blog: PS: Psolving for Psaki nearly psent me to a psychiatrist.

    Our Dirty Old Man Dept. was unable to find any psexy pshots of Jen, but we learned pshe may be a Gnats fan. Hi Jen!

    The puzzle’s theme was revealed across the bottom three answers via this clue at 66A: “With 67- and 68-Across, MC Hammer lyric that applies to each of the answers to the starred clues:” CAN’T TOUCH THIS. And the theme answers were all things that you should not touch. The most clever was at 44A: “Challenge for an under-achiever?” The answer was LIMBO BAR. Get it? As you go “under” it, you can’t touch it. (In the Jewish version of “Limbo” you just lie there and after a while someone helps you up.)

    Other things in the puzzle you can’t touch were WET PAINT, CAMERA LENS, ELECTRIC FENCE (“Shocking thing found on a farm”), and CRIME SCENE. A member of ANAL (American Nitpickers Association & League) wrote: “A ‘crime scene’ is not a singular object that can be touched. It is an environment containing multiple things. If you touch an item within that environ sans proper precautions, you have ‘contaminated’ (not touched) the scene.”

    Okay. Thanks. Can I go now?

    Steven Wright says: A friend of mine got an electric car and really liked it. After that he got an electric blanket, an electric coffeemaker, and an electric lawnmower. Then he got an electric chair, and I haven’t heard from him since.

    Two of the answers today were MAMBA (“Black _____ (snake)”) and AGED (“Developed, in a way”).

    Here’s how egs spun them: “When I got out of biz school I had nothing. It was just me and MAMBA. Of course that’s a whole lot better than starting out with just AGED.”

    Rex had a guest blogger today: Clare. She wrote: “Overall, it was a good Tuesday puzzle and makes me want to get up and dance (and also try to bring back Hammer Pants?).”

    Readers! Let’s all get up — I bet you haven’t been silly enough lately — I know I haven’t. Here’s your chance! Turn it up! (Is it just me? — Anyone else see a little Mick Jagger in there? Shattered?)

    The newly elected (by a landslide) president of Mexico, Claudia Scheinbaum, is not only a woman (duh), she’s Jewish. She’s not a religious Jew, and in fact thanked Jesus for her victory. Hmmmmmmm. Still, her first official act was to replace the taco with the blintz as the official food of the country. She may be on to something — these look fantastic. Biden! — you paying attention? Somebody — wake him up!

    Reviewing our files, here’s an item that appeared in The Onion, last February, after the Super Bowl. The headline was: Depressed Taylor Swift Going To Miss Being In The Spotlight Now That Super Bowl Over.

    Realizing her 15 minutes of fame had come to an abrupt end, a depressed Taylor Swift told reporters Monday that she was going to miss being in the spotlight now that the Super Bowl was over. “I guess it’s just me and my cats now that the big game has drawn to a close,” said the disheveled, sweatpants-wearing Swift, who drained glass after glass of wine while explaining that nobody would want to see or hear from her again now that the NFL season was over. “To think that just last night I was at the top of the world. They even put me on the jumbotron!

    OMG, what could be more delicious than this? Dr. Anthony Fauci, 83, was facing off against a gaggle of idiotic Republicans yesterday in a House subcommittee hearing on the pandemic. Owl Chatter is impressed that the GOP Reps seemed capable of dressing themselves.

    Marjorie Taylor Greene told him he belongs in prison. You go, girl! The hearing occasionally strayed from the pandemic, as when Greene waved around a photograph of some beagles and hammered Dr. Fauci over the use of dogs in federally funded experiments. She later blasted him for “repulsive evil science.” She was rebuked by the (Republican) Chair of the committee for repeatedly referring to Dr. Fauci as Mr. Fauci. (“That’ll show the little f*cker,” she mumbled.) That’s the level of moronity (moronism?) to which the GOP has fallen.

    Republicans pressed Dr. Fauci on whether he had earned drug company royalties during the pandemic. Fauci replied that he received $120 per year for inventing a monoclonal antibody treatment a quarter-century ago. He dismissed Republican allegations that he helped fund research that sparked the pandemic or had covered up the possibility it originated in a laboratory, as “absolutely false and simply preposterous.”

    Good to see you again, Doc. Give ’em hell.

    See you tomorrow!

  • Quiet Joy

    Headline in The Onion: Dalai Lama Agrees to Box Pope for Charity. The bout is to take place in Vegas this weekend. There’s already been some trash talk between the two spiritual leaders, DL claiming he’ll crucify “Franky,” and the Pope telling Lama he’ll knock him out of the cycle of life and death, (whatever the hell that is, he added). They’ll go ten rounds and it’s winner take all.

    My floss got caught on a molar last night and when I yanked on it, it pulled off the crown, breaking the tooth. Kevin the dentist was able to see me this morning and he opined that it’s best just to have the tooth pulled rather than try to save it. Fine by me. I had brought the crown/cap in and he asked me if I wanted to keep it. I said, “What, as a souvenir?” And he explained it’s a gold alloy and has value. He cleaned it off and gave me a small addressed postpaid padded envelope to send it off in. He said they’ll send me a check based on the makeup of the alloy and the weight. That was all news to me.

    Did you know teeth can be ticklish? Yup — here’s proof.

    Ian Grimshaw of the Dull Men’s Club had some advice for us grumpyheads today:

    “There seems to be quite a few comments on here lately by somewhat dissatisfied-with-life people. While daily life can leave you vexed and discontented I feel part of the art of being Dull is not to let anything bother me that much. If one thing gives an inkling of bothering me I try to find five things that give me quiet joy. For example; an inconsiderate car driver caused me some alarm yesterday when I was out for a ride on my ‘bike. I immediately engaged the ‘Find 5’ ploy and: saw 1) thatched house with straw hare on roof 2) very blue sky 3) a corridor of very tall trees in the full bloom of leaf 4) a dragonfly crossed my path 5) an empty country road for three or four minutes with lovely open, sweeping beds. Dull contentment restored.”

    It was met with a flurry of appreciative responses. Until Club Member Paul McDermott noted: “Typical bike rider not looking where he is going 😂“

    Here’s that dragonfly. (Four more to go.)

    My Zoey, who is eight, attended a friend’s birthday party yesterday that had a Taylor Swift theme. So when we popped over last night she was in the midst of picking a TS sticker to use for her backstage pass. Important stuff. “Oh, I can help you with that, Zo!” I picked one with Tay holding her arms up over her head to form a heart. Amazingly, Zoey concurred. I have to remember to think of that when I need to come up with 5 things that give me quiet joy.

    More dull men:

    James Aldredge posted: Our local pet shop has wasps in the window…I didn’t ask how much they were.

    Chris Edwards: Unlike the birds, they won’t be going cheap.

    Steve Porter:

    Last one for today: From Dull Man Gaz Trowell:

    “In 20 odd years of driving mobile plant, I’ve never used the steering wheel knob and instead use the palm of my hand.” And he posted this picture:

    This is the best club ever! See you tomorrow!

  • Poodle Skirts and Blouses

    Owl Chatter fave Caitlin Clark is complaining about the officiating in the WNBA. She (and her coach, Christie Sides) say she is getting hammered and not getting the calls. Take a look at this:

    WTF! That foul was called, but it wasn’t categorized as “flagrant.” It’s okay. Indiana won the game — its first home win of the season. Caitlin later said: “I wasn’t expecting that. But it’s just like, ‘Respond, calm down and let your play do the talking.’ It is what it is … Go make the free throw and then execute on offense.”

    For her part, Chennedy Carter, who committed the foul, did not want to talk about it after the game. “I ain’t answering no Caitlin Clark questions,” she said. Compounding the controversy, it is believed Carter said “little bitch” to Clark as she committed the foul. [Note: Caitlin is 6 feet tall. Hardly “little.”]

    The puzzle today opened the prettiest door for us. At 97D, the clue was “Sleeve style with slanted seams,” and the answer was RAGLAN.

    “On Raglan Road” is a well-known Irish song from a poem written by Patrick Kavanagh named after Raglan Road in Ballsbridge, Dublin. In the poem, the speaker recalls, while walking on a “quiet street,” a love affair that he had with a much younger woman. Although he knew he would risk being hurt if he initiated a relationship, he did so anyway. Was it ever not so?

    We sent Phil over to Dublin to look for the dark-haired Irish girl of the song. He swears he found her, and, yup, — the singer had no choice.

    Spoiler alert: Here’s how it ends:

    On a quiet street where old ghosts meet
    I see her walking now
    Away from me so hurriedly
    My reason must allow

    That I had loved not as I should
    A creature made of clay
    When the angel woos the clay
    He’ll lose his wings at the dawn of day

    A Democratic Congressman from Minny, Dean Phillips, has urged NY Gov. Kathy Hochul to pardon Trump “for the good of the country.” Crazy? Of course. But I started thinking – how about if Hochul figured out how much money NYC’s public transit system needs, and how much money CUNY needs, and all the other good NY programs that help people. And throw in a nice raise for public service employees.

    Say, it’s $7 or $8 billion. Whatever. 10? Who knows? And she says to Trump – if you can get your idiotic base to fund all this stuff, I’ll give you your pardon. It’s no skin off his ass to raise unlimited amounts of money from the morons who support him. Gov! — you listening?

    Geddes Johnson wrote this piece for Met Diary today:

    Dear Diary:

    I was walking to Grand Central early one summer Saturday. I was wearing seafoam green pants because it was to be a seafoam-green-pants type of day at the beach.

    I passed a moving van on the other side of the street where some men were unloading furniture.

    “You a doctor?” one of them yelled to me.

    “No, sir,” I replied.

    He shook his head.

    “You’ve got to get some new pants,” he said.

    And Dylan Connell shared this Tiny Love Story — about his aunt!

    Trading poodle skirts and blouses for trucker hats and flannels, decades before the term “gender nonconforming” entered the mainstream, Aunt Barbara stopped trying to fit into her Missouri farm town. I innocently called her “Uncle Barbara” as a toddler. She always laughed. For all of her standing out, for the acceptance she demanded and got, Barb’s inner life is unknowable. Long gone from cancer, she left me two important gifts: a record of her courageous clothing preferences captured in family photos, and a blazed path for her family to accept me, her gay nephew.

    The most maligned clue/answer today was at 21A. The clue was “VCR medium” and the answer was TV TAPE. Here’s Rex on it:

    I was groaning and eye-rolling a lot today, with Peak Groan coming with TV TAPE, what on god’s green earth is that supposed to be?! TV TAPE???! TV TAPE. I’m just going to keep saying it, hoping that through iteration, it will magically turn into something, something real, something someone has actually said before. Just gruesome. Embarrassing. How do you talk yourself into TV TAPE!? You gotta exercise discretion. You cannot let your wordlist push you around. There’s so much of this going around—constructors who think that just because it’s in their database, it’s good. No experienced constructor is ever going to try to palm TV TAPE off on you. Criminal. Editorial malpractice.

    Yes, but how do you really feel about it?

    As usual, egs came up with a different take:

    Our early model RCA was always falling apart. Antennas breaking off, knobs clattering to the floor, power cord fraying. I can still hear the Old Man yelling “egs, bring me the goddamn TVTAPE!”

    Did you know that a slang term for “Did a great job on” is ATE? That’s new to me. It emerged as a term of admiration and praise to describe a person, usually a woman, who was performing exceptionally well in a drag show, dance competition, or other form of performance.  “Man, she ate that sh*t up completely.” Then its application broadened.

    See those ballplayers? They play for the Tri-City Chili Peppers and they look like that because their game last night was the first ever “Cosmic Baseball” game, played entirely under “black lights.” The players, balls, bats, bases, etc. could all be seen in a neon sort of glow, but nothing else.

    Tri City plays in a Collegiate Summer League and their home town is Colonial Hgts, VA, a bit south of Richmond. The game was a success and will be repeated several times later this season. They say seats are still available for July 20, but internet sales seem to be glitching up. The Peppers beat the Greenbriar Knights 9-4, BTW.

    Hope you had some strawberries this weekend! The Mets honored Daryl Strawberry yesterday and retired his number: 18 — Chai, or Life, in Jewish numerology. Anyone with a sweet lefty swing like that, and such a big gracious smile, is welcome as an honorary Jew, for sure. Daryl had his troubles off the field, but he battled through them and is a real mensch today. You’ll always be in the lineup at Owl Chatter, Straw.

    Georgie! — get our slugger a cold Diet Coke! And see if we have any Doritos left.

    What a joyous face! Good night, everybody. See you tomorrow!

  • School Buses

    Jeez Louise!! Can’t a girl climb f*cking Mt. Everest without some asshole trying to get into her expedition pants??!!

    Well put, Georgie. Our George is referring to a front page story in the NYT today decrying the sexual abuse faced way too often by serious women climbers on expeditions. Of course, even once is too often.

    Lotta Hintsa may not stir the passions when dressed like this:

    But she is blue-eyed, blonde, and was Miss Finland in 2013 as well as Finland’s Miss Universe entrant that year. Here she is. Thanks, Philly. Nice lighting.

    Hintsa is a model and serious high-altitude mountain climber, a sport that is rapidly growing more popular with women: 65 women reached the summit of Mt. Everest last year, about 10% of the total, which our math department says would be around 650. Back in 2003, only ten women made the climb; in 2013, 45. It’s serious business — 18 climbers died during the Spring season last year, and 8 have already been reported dead or missing in 2024.

    The cost of a climb starts at $40,000 and will hit six figures for “a more luxurious experience,” says The Times. You entrust your life to your guide.

    Hintsa became a professional climber in 2018. She ran across Nirmal Purja at base camps in Nepal and Pakistan. Purja is a superstar in that world. His climb of all fourteen 8,000-meter peaks on earth in 2019 was the subject of a Netflix documentary. He has 2 million followers on Instagram. Via his guiding company, he has helped usher in a new era of commercial high-peak climbing, and encourages women to take it up.

    Hintsa and Purja met in his hotel room to discuss working on an expedition. Some of their text messages were a bit flirty so she made it clear to him ahead of time that the meeting was “not a booty call.” Nevertheless, when she was in his suite, he led her to the bed and began undressing her. She kept saying no, but that meant nothing in the state he was in. She was fearful of his strength and military training. Only when she forcefully resisted his removing her bra did the spell break, he pulled back, and she got the hell out of there safely. Of course, she did no business with his company.

    Purja is not alone in his monsterhood. A 2018 survey of more than 5,000 climbers from over 60 countries found that 47% of women (and 16% of men) said they were subjected to unwanted sexual behavior while climbing.  Thirty-five percent of the men complained that they weren’t. [No they didn’t.]

    Just this February, a 39-year-old climber named Charles Barrett was convicted of three counts of sexual abuse for repeatedly assaulting a woman who was visiting Yosemite National Park. Get this — he was prosecuted in part as a result of that survey, above. The woman he assaulted answered the survey saying she had been raped by a “well-known, professional California climber” on a trip to Yosemite. Another respondent also said she had been sexually assaulted by a specific individual. Survey organizers followed up with the women and they both identified Barrett as the rapist/assailant. He has written guidebooks and was a major figure in California climbing. In case you are not sufficiently disgusted by this schmuck, prosecutors described his attack on his victim as a “violent rape.”   He is set to be sentenced on Tuesday. Good riddance.

    Conversely, Purja denies everything and his star has continued to rise. As a face of high-altitude climbing, he has worked with companies like Red Bull and Nike, which this past winter released a clothing collection inspired by him, called 8K Peaks, and featured him in a towering Manhattan billboard. He received an honorary doctorate from Loughborough U. in England. Outdoor brands including Grivel, Osprey and Scarpa have worked with him on co-branded products. The women who are recounting their experiences with him are just trying to get the word out so others aren’t victimized.

    At Owl Chatter, we’re giving George the last word on this story.

    “F*ck you, Purja,” he said.

    You tell ’em, buddy! Just don’t step backwards!! Georrrrrrrggggge! (Ouch.) Hintsa — you got a rope or something to throw down to him? And maybe some Cheetos?

    On the lighter side, remember The Turtles? Sure you do — who didn’t love The Turtles? Well, the clue at 16A today was “Title woman in a 1968 Turtles hit.” The answer: ELENORE. Here’s the tune. Note the great lyrics:

    Elenore, gee, I think you’re swell
    And you really do me well
    You’re my pride and joy, et cetera

    And: Your looks intoxicate me — even though your folks hate me.

    And: I really think you’re groovy — let’s go out to a movie.

    In the comments to Rex’s blog today it emerged that two very active contributors – Nancy and egsforbreakfast — both celebrate their birthdays today. egs remarked on the coincidence and it reminded me of my Statistics class at Brandeis where the prof assigned us the task of figuring out the chances of any two class members sharing a birthday. There were 30 in the class and it worked out to 70%. That is, there was a 7 in 10 chance that two of us in the class had the same birthday. One student said, “Let’s try it.” So we went up the rows announcing our birth dates. Sure enough, about halfway through, we hit a match. A hush fell over the crowd.

    Here’s a story I may share with the Dull Men’s Club:

    When I ordered my sheet of 32-cent Civil War stamps (for just $5.25!) so I could get the one with Clara Barton on it, the seller sent it to me using a whole bunch of neat old “priced” stamps, i.e., not “forever” stamps. There was a 44-cent Garfield (the cat, not the president) stamp, two 41-cent Mickey Mouse stamps, a 41-cent Aladdin stamp, a 15-cent Seeing-Eye-Dog stamp, and some smaller denominations. And they weren’t canceled and they were easy to remove!!

    So I used them to arrive at as many 68-cent combinations as I could (the current cost of a one-ounce mailing). The 44-cent Garfield, combined with the 15-cent Seeing-Eye-Dog came to 59 cents and I had a ten-cent stamp to add on. Perfect!

    I had a 3-center and two 4-centers to add to the 41 cent stamps bringing them up to 44 or 45 cents. So I just had to add a 24-cent “additional ounce stamp” to each to get up to (or over) 68 cents. I had seen a version of this stamp with a nice yellow school bus on it.

    I went to the Green Village post office near me this morning and asked the woman for three “additional ounce 24-cent” stamps. She said, “I hope I have some.” I said, “Oh, no!” and noted that they have school buses on them, to aid her in her search. She found some, but with cute bunny rabbits on them — not the school buses. Fine by me. I had exact change ready (72 cents) and the transaction went smoothly.

    Sometimes, maybe not often, everything in life works out just fine.

    See you tomorrow!