What do Bobo Holloman and Tyler Gilbert have in common? Well, both were major league pitchers. Gilbert is still only 30 and is in the Cincy minor league system. He played college ball at USC and was with ‘Zona when he was in the majors. Bobo died in 1987 at the age of 64. He had a good minor league career and finally made it up to the Bigs in 1953 with St. Louis — the Browns back then. His MLB lifetime stats are pretty unimpressive: 3-7 with an ERA of 5.23. He got his nickname from a minor league owner whom he reminded of Bobo Newsome, a great pitcher who won over 200 games. Gilbert hasn’t lit the sport on fire either (yet) with a lifetime record of 2-7 and an ERA of 4.32.

What they have in common is they are the only MLB pitchers in the modern era (since 1900) to pitch no-hitters in their first starts. Bobo’s was on May 6, 1953 against the Philly Athletics in Sportsman Park in St. Louis. It was a rainy night and only 2,473 fans were there. Holloman struck out three batters and had two hits himself. The score was 6-0. Browns owner Bill Veeck said Holloman was hit pretty hard all night and was saved by great defense and good luck. Ouch! Still, history was made.

Gilbert pitched his no-no more than 68 years later, on August 14, 2021 in Chase Field in Phoenix. ‘Zona beat San Diego 7-0. He struck out five and walked three.

I love little baseball stories like those and when I can incorporate them into my autograph collection, I do. I picked up the following items, see below. About $18 for Bobo and just a couple of bucks for Gilbert.

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Life is tough enough without having to worry about being run down by a giant bratwurst, amirite? Minny’s excellent outfielder Byron Buxton stepped out of the dugout recently, little realizing how close he came to being pancaked by a sausage.

If you are wondering why giant sausages are racing around the baseball field during a game — that’s a fair question. Many stadiums run theme races like this in between innings to amuse and delight kids in the crowd. Well, actually almost everyone loves them.

The sausage race is in Milwaukee, famous for beer and brats, of course. The Nats (in DC) have a “Presidents” race. The Yankees have three subway lines race, but that just takes place on the scoreboard — nobody dresses up in a subway costume. Oakland has huge-headed likenesses of Hall of Famers Dennis Eckersley, Rollie Fingers, and Rickey Henderson racing. Rickey was in attendance at a game where his giant head won the race. He cheered his Rickey on over the PA system and then exclaimed: “That’s what I’m talkin’ about, Motherf*cker!” (No he didn’t.)

Sticking with baseball a bit longer — here’s a story that really stinks. Shohei Ohtani hit his first home run as a Dodger. Good for him. The ball was caught by a woman named Ambar Roman, a life-long (till now) Dodger fan at the game with her hubby. She is the owner of the ball and can go home with it. But if, like this one, it has significance for the team or the player, they negotiate for it with the fan. And that’s where things got icky.

According to the couple, Ambar was escorted away by security and kept separated from her husband. The Dodgers then pressured her to give up the ball for a few signed items. An auction house estimated the ball’s value at $100,000. The Dodgers told her if she took it home, they’d refuse to authenticate it, which would have a major effect on its valuation.

Here’s what her husband Alexis said:

“They really took advantage of her. There were a bunch of (security) guys around her. They wouldn’t let me talk to her or give her any advice. There was no way for us to leave. They had her pretty much cornered in the back.”

To add a weird twist to it, Ohtani later said he talked to the fans who had the ball. But they say they never met him.

The Dodgers are “open to a further conversation.” Yup. There’ll be a lawyer at this one.

Philly! Our readers would like to see Ambar — you able to catch a shot of her? Maybe with the ball? Nice work!

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You know that business of checking a box saying you are not a robot? Some commenters on Rex’s blog have to do that. Today, B$ asked: “How does checking a box “prove” that I’m not a robot? Maybe I’m just a super smart robot who knows I need to check a box.”

Teleiotis explained:

It’s actually kinda interesting but also kinda creepy — it’s a non-standard checkbox that’s not only more difficult for a spammer to check in the first place (you can’t just send a simple command to mark it “checked” but actually have to go through the process with a cursor), but it also tracks the exact timing of all your mouse movements of when and how you click it.

So if it gets clicked as soon as the page loads without any mouse movement? Robot. If there’s a bunch of mouse movements but it’s pixel-perfect identical to a previously submitted form? Robot. If it’s a bunch of mathematically random movement? Robot. And so forth.

Whereas if the person has been gradually scrolling the page, and moves the cursor in regular “human” ways that don’t precisely match anybody else’s pixel-for-pixel and otherwise don’t give away common signs of being simulated, then: not a robot.

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The puzzle today was by Rachel Goldstein — one of the best constructors. It was a challenge and I’m proud that I finished it.

“[blank] Mundi” was ANNO and it means “the year of the world.” It’s a calendar era based on when the world was created, according to the Bible. Thus, the Hebrew year this year is 5784. And the Byzantine year is 7532.

Had you heard of this? At 30A: “Dance party where participants wear wireless headphones.” ANS: SILENT DISCO. I can picture it. Neat. egsforbreakfast, hysterical as usual, said: “I hadn’t heard of SILENTDISCO, but I’m a big fan of Silent Arena Rock, where the bands wear headsets and the audience hears nothing.”

61A was “[blank] ceremony, tradition in Sephardic weddings” and the answer was HENNA. It takes place several days before the wedding. The happy couple has henna applied to their palms. It stays on for a few days, so they can be identified as the marrying couple at the wedding. It stems from the biblical tale of Jacob being tricked into marrying the wrong sister (Leah, instead of Rachel). The workmanship can be gorgeous. [The Bible says that when Jacob found out whom he married, he said: D’oh! — It’s the first recorded use of the expression.]

If I am not mistaken, Owl Chatter friend Vermont Liz’s daughter Bridget is a henna artist, among her many pursuits. That right, Liz?

Speaking of Jacob, the clue at 30A was “Nickname alternative to Coby, perhaps,” and the answer was JAKE. I guess someone named Jacob could be nicknamed Coby or Jake?

At 4D, “They bring up the rear” was CABOOSES. Someone thought the answer should be “cat poses.”

The longest train I ever saw
Went down that Georgia line
The engine passed at six o’clock
CABOOSE went by at nine.

That’s from a Loretta Lynn song called “In the Pines.” You don’t want to hear it, believe me.

At 58A for the clue “Helter-skelter” the answer was IN DISARRAY. Here’s egs again:

Welcome to today’s lecture on complex operations on multiple arrays. INDISARRAY, we have the set of all prime numbers. INDatARRAY, we have the set of all whole numbers. When we subtract the one from the other, we get only the numbers which are no longer in their prime! [Ba da boom!]

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Congressman Clay Higgins of Louisiana is the Chair of the House Homeland Security Subcommittee on Border Enforcement. Serious stuff. It’s good to get to know our reps a little, so it’s good that he engaged in a lengthy interview in a podcast this week. He revealed that he conducted “his own extensive investigation” and has evidence that the entire Jan. 6 insurrection was instigated by FBI agents planted in pro-Trump groups. (Speaking of groups, during the interview Higgins was wearing a shirt with the logo of the Three Percenters, a right-wing anti-government militia.) He claimed Federal agents posing as Trump supporters traveled to DC on 1/6 to trick real Trump backers to engage in mob violence.

On Biden’s election, which was fraudulent, of course, he said it was “very suspicious” that while votes were being counted Biden overtook Trump in certain key states. My God, man — what more proof do you need??

His claims of “ghost buses” that were clearly engaged in nefarious anti-Trump actions came from a whistleblower who said he saw “two white tour buses” at Union Station early in the morning of 1/6, which later disappeared. “We don’t know what happened to them,” Higgins said.

Open your eyes, readers! — how much more proof do you need?? The tour buses just disappeared!!

The Congressman is clearly an idiot of the highest order. It’s actually impressive. He was divorced from three wives and is currently married to his fourth. The second sued him for $140,000 of unpaid child support. He was a cop before coming to Congress and was accused of using too much force.

We asked Phil to get us some shots of the Congressman for this story, but he just told us to “kiss his hasselblad.” We didn’t push.

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See you tomorrow. Go Hawkeyes!