I don’t think I ever started my tax class without a reference to Gertrude Stein that I stole from my tax prof at Penn Law, Bernie Wolfman, alav hashalom. I would talk about my friend Richie who found $100 on the street in SOHO. The question we discussed was, does the tax law require him to report it as taxable income? After we bat it around a bit, I tell the class that it is taxable because Gertrude Stein wrote Section 61 of the Internal Revenue Code, which says: Income is income is income.

Gertrude Stein was born on this date in 1874 in Allegheny, PA. Happy birthday, old girl!

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Poets who don’t take themselves too seriously, and who aren’t phonies, have a much better chance of getting their work past the Owl Chatter guard puppies. X. J. Kennedy was a good example. He passed away at the age of 96 at his home in Peabody MA on Sunday. His “Brats” series for young readers featured humorous cautionary tales in verse.

Garth, from off the garden wall,
Ate a rosebush, roots and all.
Doctors worked on him for hours.
The family requests, “no flowers.”

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In Rex Parker’s writeups on the NYT puzzles he often makes fun of the wrong paths his brain leads him on. You know, you’ll have a few letters of a word, and assume an answer that turns out to be way off, or that you parse crazily. Today, there was an answer that was REGRET. Rex had the last five letters and thought of the bird (EGRET). And he didn’t let go of it even when the R appeared, momentarily thinking “R-egret? Is there such a thing as a Republican egret?” (He continued down that path:) Sung to the tune of “American Woman” by the Guess Who: “Republican egret / Stay away from me! / Republican egret / Mama let me be!”

I chimed in to note that Rex may have uncovered an Ogden Nash poem:

The Republican egret
Has much to regret

Whatsername commented that she loved it! I’m shallow enough that it made my day.

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The theme of the puzzle today was INSIDE VOICES, clued with “What children should use at the library.” Then in four long answers, the names of singers were buried. E.g., TUNN[EL VIS]ION concealed ELVIS.

Re “inside voices,” I shared that I had a cousin who worked for many years in the Brooklyn Public Library system as a shusher.

Since the clue at 53A was “Beyond well-done” for BURNT, we got a double reference with the following song (ELVIS and BURNT):

That’s Aimee Mann. ‘Til Tuesday was her band. Phil said he had a really nice visit with her, despite being drunk (him, of course, not her).

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Commenter Lewis had the sweetest response to the puzzle today:

“My favorite answer is INSIDE VOICES, which threw me back into elementary school, where teachers admonished us to use them as we walked in a line to the library, and if one of us spoke too loudly while there, the teacher would sternly repeat the phrase.

“Then I fondly flashed on – actually saw in my mind’s eye — the two elementary school teachers I adored.

“That was followed by vivid elementary school memories, such as in second grade, when my teacher and another teacher were flirting. All the kids tittered about it, and I was proud to be chosen to relay her love notes to him.

“Crosswords, they wake things up, no?”

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A frequent complaint among the Commentariat cites the “dumbing down” of the NYTXW. The consensus is it has been made easier to increase subscriptions. Commenter Gary had enough of this “it’s too easy” whining, and let loose today. (For the record, I agree with the complainers: the XWs used to be more challenging and, thus. more rewarding to solve.) Here’s Gary:

It’s the fashion of our blog participants to append an adjective to the word easy prior to launching into a tirade of thinly veiled contempt for the perceived tragic state of affairs at the NYTXW. Today it’s absurdly easy, but my favorite phrase, usually voiced by one of our beloved Anonymoti is insultingly easy.

These plaintive cries from the barnyard of our fickle flock have been ongoing for years. The weeping juxtaposed next to the inconvenient fact the puzzle is more popular and more profitable than ever leaves me curious why a narrow band of highly experienced solvers keeps showing up, keeps complaining, keeps sharing their apocalyptic adjectives next to “easy.” Occasionally, I wonder aloud, how long will you keep doing over and over the same thing and expecting a different result?

With the obsessive need to do the Times crossword it appears the insane addiction is permanent, and unlike Cnut, we will be yelling at the tides day after day in our petty way until our candle is snuffed out. Darned you brain for being able to do the puzzle produced by this venue! I can imagine an old man standing in the magazine aisle of the grocery store holding a book of Dell Fun to Solve crosswords above his head and yelling at passers-by, “These are too easy! They’re not fun to solve. Damn you Dell and Albertsons for letting me buy these puzzle books.” I picture a kind-hearted grocery clerk with one of those giant brooms swooshing up to him, patting the maniacal man on the back, gently saying he understands, letting him know everything will be fine, and saying, “Maybe these puzzles aren’t for you anymore.”

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From The Onion:

Funeral Canceled Due to Runaway Corpse.

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See you tomorrow! Thanks for popping in.